Swamiji’s Sandesh … ‘ठहराव’

Swamiji says …

” Be it the news channels on our TV sets, social media, our workplace, or even our friend circle – irrespective of the medium or the social situation in which we could be, we do see someone or the other gossiping and spreading rumours; using inflammatory and abusive language; bullying and trolling or even outrightly threatening others with dire consequences.
While a generally held belief is that these are consequences of poor education or poverty; a deeper study would reveal that the ones most likely to display such grotesque behaviour are the ones educated at top-notch schools and colleges and work at some of the most recognised and prestigious organisations in the world.”

“Clearly, there is something amiss here ! What is lacking is not education – nor does it have to do anything about where the individual comes from ! It is simply due to lack of maturity, ‘ठहराव’, ‘sthirtah’…when one gets so carried away by the tempest of his emotions that he is unable to control himself from behaving in a manner least befitting him and least expected from him !”

“ It is essential for people to behave in a mature manner as they grow older with time. Yet, unfortunately, these days the trend seems to have reversed and there is an acute shortage of ‘mature’ adults. There is increasing disquiet in the minds of many adults today – a lack of depth and stability (स्थिरता) in their minds and hearts – as a result of which their actions are often fraught with recklessness and danger.”

“ There are times when one feels like sharing his problems with another person; talking his heart out to him or her and letting them know about his personal issues. And as soon as he shares his personal grief, or takes such people into confidence, he regrets it almost immediately, as his personal life becomes a matter of hot discussion over WhatsApp messages, office lunches, and evening get-togethers. The inability of a person to respect the trust that is placed by someone in him, while confiding a secret, stems from the person’s immaturity. Such a person does not think twice before spreading the news of the other person’s personal affairs like wild fire – as he has no ‘ठहराव’ – but rather bubbles with eagerness, to spill out anything he considers as potentially scandalous, and news-worthy. He is bereft of the foresight to see the damage his gossip-mongering could cause to the concerned person.”

“Such immaturity is also on full display in business houses and organisations where impulsive and knee-jerk actions from leadership and management lead to the downfall of an entire company. In times of crisis, a CEO should not lose his mental strength and confidence – but should be able to look at matters as they are, good or bad, and make decisions in a rational manner. Yet, we often see rash decisions being taken by Ivy-league educated elite when the going gets tough. This is the sign of a mind that has already taken the ‘flight in fear’ and has not grown with experience to realise that the best way forward in difficult times is to keep one’s head down and keep trying.“

“We often see such people also engaging in petty office politics and harassing their juniors – a full display of ‘छिछोरापन’. Instead of being a welcoming mentor and an inspiring leader, these people – drunk with the power of the position they hold – a sign of a weak mind – look to suppress new talent out of fear that they might be eclipsed by these newbies one day. A stoic and स्थिर individual, on the other hand, would look to build a talented team around him as he would be wise enough to realise that he can only be promoted if he has subordinates capable of taking his current role.”

“ Moreover, many among us are neither adolescents, nor very young, now. But if our behaviour continues to be childish or immature, we could create unwanted misunderstandings and unnecessary problems of such a nature that could make us lose all those we love and hold dear. The mind is like a lake. One stone, one thought – joyous or fearful, one piece of information – is all that it takes to create a series of ripples in it, and then into a stormy sea. Yet, it is our duty to learn to calm the mind. To not let the stones hurled at it create ripples, but simply skid away from the surface. We must learn to observe and engage with the world – ‘maya’ – around us, yet, not let it engulf our minds. Only then will we be able to develop some degree of ‘ठहराव’” within us !