Dedicated to Swamiji Ajay Jain ji

Swami ji said…

Any promise made by us ; any commitment given by us to someoneone else – must be honoured and must be fulfilled. The moment we utter words that convey an assurance of any kind , we are bound by them and it becomes on us – to act on them – as it becomes our ‘dharm’. Making a promise to someone ; to give someone an assurance of doing something for him ; to stand by him – should not be taken lightly. Someone’s hopes could be pinned on the promise made to him by us.
Not keeping a promise – is nothing short of ‘adharma’.

But , in today’s world, promises are rarely kept. We see it happen everywhere – with us, around us and also often by us. Why do we do this? Why does it happen? The truth is that commitments are often made while in a sense of stupor or grandiose – without much regard to the implications of the words uttered by us. Or else promises are used as a means to impress or deceive. But very rarely are they made with the intent of being acted upon.

Somewhere in our minds, we have come to terms with the thought – that it is alright to not keep promises. Society as such has made not keeping promises acceptable. Even the person who is given an assurance nowadays – is often sure that the promise that has been made to him will not materialise.

But, an unkept promise is nothing but a lie. And that is why we all unwillingly commit…कुकर्म – bad ‘karma’ – when we say things we don’t mean to adhere to.

And , while most of us might think of how others have not kept their promises to us and cheated us , a little introspection will show us how many times we cheat ourselves too.
Yes, many times, people who take money from us fail to give it back as promised , but , this financial loss does not hurt us as much as the loss our soul feels , when we fail to meet the promises we make to ourselves.

“I will not smoke from tomorrow…”, “I will not drink today…”, “I will pray daily…”, “I will call him tomorrow…” – all these are promises too. Promises we make to ourselves. Unfortunately, we unfailingly fail to keep them most of the time.
Initially, we ignore these failures on our part. But , gradually, as time passes, and we keep deceiving ourselves, lying to ourselves – the spirit within us is weakened. It understands that the words we tell ourselves are devoid of any truth or resolve. We gradually lose confidence in ourselves. We are defeated not by anyone else, not by life, but by ourselves. Since we fail to meet even the smallest of expectations from ourselves, we are unable to gather the courage and confidence to seek any bigger challenge. Life gradually becomes devoid of any sort of fulfilment.

What can thus be done to avoid this crisis? We cannot simply stop making promises. Such an escapist attitude would serve us no good. But , what we can do is to be careful about what we commit. Whether in personal or professional relationships, we must promise only that which we are sure of fulfilling. Our assurances must be honest and measured. They must not be made to only please or comfort someone, but , must also convey that which is realistic and can be truly achieved in the future.

Even the spiritual seeker makes many promises to himself or to God. Although these promises are made with good intent and meaning , they are often too challenging or difficult to keep.Thus, even promises made with a good intention for our spiritual upliftment too – can become the untruth – if they are not kept. For example, not everyone can meditate for an hour daily. This requires practice, discipline and immense effort. However, one can commit to meditating for an hour every weekend or one can definitely take out ten minutes to devote to meditation every day. It is only when we are successful in keeping these promises to ourselves – that we will start making further progress in – ” दूसरों मे यह विश्वास जगा ने के लिये कि वह अपने दिये हुए वादे को हमेशा पूरा करता हैं …” Only then can one begin to set goals for oneself – with a sense of commitment and purpose and start achieving them. Remind yourself that promises are meant to be kept – not to be broken.

If we make it a point to keep a promise ; if we put into effect the words that were said to someone that have ignited hope and belief in him ; if we make a resolve to never break a promise – we will not really be surprised to find ourselves gradually meeting people with this rare habit.This is because the ability of committing oneself to one’s word requires discipline, mental strength and honesty. And those who have such qualities are bound to find each other. Nurturing such qualities makes us excel in life and fulfills us with a sense of achievement. We need to remember that – “अगर हम ‘ईश्वर’ और ‘गुरू’ को अपने चित – मन से वादा करते हैं तो हमें उसे जरूर पूरा करना चाहिए…”

Swami ji said…

Whenever we go for job interviews, attend a social gathering or prepare for a meeting with someone of significance – we unfailingly put our best foot forward. We make it a point to be punctual ; are well turned out ; revisit everything that we need to take with us. All in all – a picture of near perfection is projected by us to others.We feel that doing so is imperative for us to be successful.

Such occasions, of course, do not come every day in life , and , we begin to ease off from the strict regulations that we had imposed on ourselves for those important days. Some of us could skip baths ; some may oversleep ; some might not adhere to any schedule on any other normal day. All in all, when not under any seeming obligation, we seem to be rather happy in taking a short cut.This is the way we approach life most of the time. In fact, for many of us, life seems to be passing by – just this way. We do only that – which is just enough for us to ‘get by’. Our mind directs us towards a path that is ‘comfortable’ – well drawn out ; plain and smooth. The path of least resistance. Comfort becomes our priority. Everything else – dreams, ambitions, principles – take a back seat.

But, over a period of time, many of us begin to feel dissatisfied in living life in such a way.The heart longs for a sense of purpose ; a sense of achievement. When there is such a disconnect between the heart and one’s actions, one is bound to feel dejected and frustrated…’हम निराश होने लगते हैं… ‘After all, we need to have an ambition in life.

But , even at such a stage in life, one must not get disheartened. Instead of simply giving up and drowning in self – loathing, one must begin the challenging, but, not impossible task of self-improvement. For the spiritual seeker, this is often the first step towards God. It is only when one starts becoming aware of one’s ‘self’ ; it is only when we start reflecting and asking whether we are living life the ‘correct’ way, the ‘right’ way – can we even consider making changes in our actions and the way we live.

The biggest challenge one comes across in this process – is that of changing oneself immediately. After all, old habits die hard. It is not easy to let go of old habits , and , time and time again, we will find ourselves doing exactly what should not be done by us ; should be avoided by us at all cost. The promise made to ourselves – to meditate everyday ; to make it a regular habit – seems to fade away in the face of other distractions – and we might invariably – sometimes quite inexplicably – postpone or cut down on our meditation time – by over a week. Such failures and realisations can be very disappointing and can raise doubts in our mind about our own ability to change. But , one must remember that this is the struggle we have to go through and overcome them ourselves. In the process of self-change, we realise how strong and powerful the mind is, and , how we need to stay vigilant and not give in to its ability of taking us down the path of ‘comfort’ again.

We may often question -‘Why should I choose a life of discipline, of ‘tyaag’ – when I can live a life of comfort ?’ We can barely ‘see’ how could this kind of a life be of any use to us ? But our entire perspective changes once we see an unprecedented ‘change’ happen, take place in us. It is possible that a person – who till recently found pleasure only in partying hard – is able to turn into a new leaf – on experiencing true bliss in chanting His name ; on waking up early in the morning to make an effort to connect with God – as he finally begins to understand that it is He alone who can liberate him from the never – ending cycle of birth and death ; that all other relationships are temporary – except for the permanent relationship that he shares with God. The attachment that he earlier had with every possible thing on Earth – is replaced by detachment – and he begins to regret the precious time that he has wasted on only accumulating material possessions – rather than concentrating on his spiritual growth and upliftment – which would make him truly wealthy – on receiving God’s Grace , love and blessings. We can change ourselves, if , we are determined to do so.

Swami ji said…

During a time, not too long ago , large, happy families lived in joint households – with sounds of children chattering and playing ; peals of laughter and hearty ; healthy discussions radiating love and happiness – were audible to the neighbours and others around them. Affection, appreciation for other family members and acceptance of all – was from the heart – genuine and honest. Anyone who brought anything – small little things that brought happiness – shared them with others lovingly.
Sharing was caring. The policy of divide and rule had not reared its ugly head in those days of old.
Differences, if any, were accepted and forgotten – and undue importance was not given to minor issues that would crop up once in a while. Materialistic
needs were minimal and every heart was filled to the brim with love for all.

But , fast forward to today – and it appears as though – ‘ रिश्ते नातों का आज ज़्यादा महत्व नहीं रहा ‘. More than relationships – it is money that has begun to matter more to us – as we feel that money makes the world go round. A good household today, is defined, not necessarily by the level of happiness and understanding between people who live in it; but by irrelevant issues like – how big the house is ; how well it is decorated ; the current market value of the house – and we are filled with awe and respect on learning about the exorbitant cost of the famous address. Even the people who live in it are more concerned about the ‘price’ that the house commands rather than the ‘price’ they pay for neglecting family bonds, relationships, and responsibilities towards those who should matter to them.

Yes, economic conditions for many are better today – than they were yesterday. There is more wealth and money to be ‘enjoyed’ by us today. But at what cost has this been achieved ? Families are fractured by infighting over wealth distribution. Siblings squabble over familial wealth. Relatives envy each other over the salaries drawn by their children at their workplace. Parents are wary of children leaving them in a hand to mouth situation and vice-versa. Money, ultimately, has taken up more space in our minds than it might ever in our bank accounts – but , strangely , we appear to be happy in seeing that change happen in us.

What is the point of living in a house – however ornamental and opulent it is ; however big it is – if joy doesn’t reside
in it ; if happiness by – passes that ‘house’ – as it is yet to become a ‘home’. And, this is exactly what afflicts society today. In trying to make our bank accounts healthier – we have made our hearts smaller – leaving no space for love and affection to be given to others…”हम डरते हैं कि हमसे कोई कुछ माँग ना ले…”

While the physical needs and wants are fully met and indulged in – the emotional needs begin to want – as there could be not many to share our joys with ; no one to disclose our fears to. While we might accumulate some wealth ; we will also at the same time accumulate twice the amount of doubt and fear in our hearts ; that we might lose what we have gained, today, to someone else tomorrow ! How, then, in such a state of mind can we ever hope to have a trusting and healthy relationship with others ?

Today , we spend most of our time trying to make ourselves wealthier – and while there is no shame in doing that in an honest manner – it must never be forgotten that nothing ; not a penny’s worth of any ‘thing’ that we had spent our life in accumulating – can accompany us to the next life. It is only our ‘karma’ that will be our constant companion – till the end of time. There is no escaping its fruits – good or bad. Thus, we must try just as hard, if , not more, to do good to people around us – much like we do to make money. Earning a mother or father’s invaluable blessings ; a sibling’s appreciation – are far more valuable than the costliest jewels in the world.

Swami ji said…

What happens when one plants seeds in the soil ? A few perish within the ground itself on not receiving adequate water and nutrients – and turn into soil themselves. Some show promise and grow into small saplings. But , some of these saplings get trampled upon accidentally ; are flooded by water or eaten by an animal – and their dream to grow bigger ends there itself – for no fault of theirs. Yet, there are some that grow into trees. And, even among these trees – some are cut down for wood ; some are trimmed down every time they grow. And, then, there are some which grow into huge beautiful trees, bountiful with fruits and flowers – and live to see years and generations pass by.

Our fate, our lives are similar to those of the seeds. There are billions like us on the planet – each one of us filled with dreams and hopes to achieve something big. And , like some of those seeds that grow into big trees later ; some of us – from among the millions – might succeed in building our dreams into reality; while the remaining mostly are unable to do so – sometimes due to various circumstances ; sometimes due to lack of knowledge and a plethora of other reasons. We all aim for the stars, but, not each one of us can shine bright like them. It is only a handful of us who are able to leave a legacy; leave an imprint on the echelons of time and have our names remembered by future generations.

And, yes, while all this requires hard work, sacrifice and effort – one must not forget, that just like the seeds, one also needs fate to be on his side. One needs the stars to align for him to get all the right opportunities at the right time. And, thus, those select few of us who are successful, must never forget that without God’s Grace our lives could have turned out a lot different from the one that we enjoy today.

But, heavy is the head that wears the crown. Success doesn’t come easy. One has to go through the grind and a demanding time period before he is able to taste success. But , to remain successful is even more demanding. In such circumstances, it is very easy to forget how one has reached where he is. All that God’s benevolence and our efforts have given us – is eventually taken for granted. The humility that once arose within us from the realisation that one had been very lucky as compared to others – is slowly replaced by entitlement and pride – that tells us that we rightfully deserve the success that we have. We find it difficult to enjoy the success of others, as we now feel it is something that we alone must have. This is the transformation that we must be wary of. Do not fall prey to the dogma of a dog eat dog world. We must remind ourselves that
excellence need not be accompanied with arrogance and wealth and money need not be just for the greedy.

Being successful, being envied for our skills and talents – these are not just our achievements, but, also characteristics that God has blessed us with for a particular reason. There is certainly no way that He would like to see us being coercive, aggressive or dishonest in our behaviour with others. He, in fact, puts us in such positions to only further accentuate and show the world our good qualities and habits ; our principles and beliefs that have made us worthy of His love and Grace in the first place.

To guard ourselves against an undesirable change in our attitude, temperament and nature in future – one must always reflect on how fortunate he is to be unique and exceptional. One must not think that his struggles of the past have made him deserving of something better in the present moment ; but , he should be grateful that God put an end to those struggles for him. Every time we see others struggling in life, we must be thankful for what we have. The more we ‘get’ in life, the more we must ‘detach’ – and think of what God would want us to do next.

Our winnings and triumphs in life are only meant to enable us to do good ‘karma’ more easily. Even victorious conquerors had to rule as good and just kings – to be respected by the masses. Success itself is not the end all. It must be accompanied with kindness and humility.

Swami ji said…

What is wealth to us ? What do we understand by the meaning of the words being wealthy – ‘धनवान’ होना? For most of us today wealth is synonymous with money, cars, houses, jewellery, and other possessions. In fact, to think of wealth as a means to anything else would seem unimaginable to almost everyone around us. Society always measures a man’s worth on a materialistic scale. Great respect is given to those who have surplus wealth and unlimited assets. If we could hear ourselves talk the way we do – about wealthy people – the reverential tone, the hushed voice with a mix of admiration and jealousy – as we describe what they have or possess – we would most certainly be embarrassed later. In fact, when we talk or discuss about the rich and famous , it appears as though we are talking about our heroes ; our role models.

But , this is also the truth about us. Modern day heroes are the wealthiest of businessmen, actors and sportspersons. Their swanky cars, expensive clothes, sprawling mansions – inspire the youth to work hard to accumulate their own wealth.The dreams of people today are all about possessing the same things and having luxurious and comfortable lifestyles.

But , where do we place God in all of this? Today, He , is mostly reached out to when one looks for wealth for his own benefit frantically. Most of the prayers He receives from us – are but requests – to be granted more money, more land, more of everything. In such a world, the soul ; the spirit have only a diminishing value. The urge to possess more has outrun the need to know – oneself.

But , perhaps we need to take a step back and see why we behave like this ; what makes us behave like this. It is because our mind is not at peace. We have convinced ourselves that we can only be happy when we ‘possess’ something. This approach is bound to cause misery.True wealth of course, is having ‘happiness and joy’, ‘peace of mind’ – but , we are miles away from these – aa we have somehow learnt to relate happiness purely with earning money and accumulating possessions. Yes, lack of money can truly be stressful, but , excess of it can not guarantee happiness and a solution of problems. Money cannot buy us emotions. Houses can shelter the body, but , they cannot shelter the mind and soul. So, perhaps it is time we prayed to God to show us, how we can truly achieve ‘peace’ within. Perhaps He can tell us, guide us towards what we need to be truly wealthy.

Isn’t good health – wealth? Are we not willing to give away all our money in order to be healthy again, or , to see our loved one recover from a dreadful disease and be safe and sound once again? Isn’t ‘knowledge’ wealth – for without it – it would be difficult to navigate the different places around us ?Why then do we let ourselves develop a tunnel vision just for materialistic possessions?

In all
probability , it might not be possible for us to understand on our own – what ‘true’ wealth is ! Does wealth and wealthy refer to people with millions in their bank account , or , to those who have a bare nominal amount in their accounts ?Neither will actually ever know. If there is anyone who knows anything at all about this – then it is only God and ‘guru.’ The only thing that we can do is try our best to follow their guidance and directions unfailingly. If we develop the skill to listen to Him ; to challenge ourselves to follow the path towards which He guides us – we are bound to find true wealth. And, maybe, that is what we all should pray for – His blessings ; His presence in our lives ; His Hand on our head. Because once we have all of this – there is none wealthier than us.