Month: April 2025

Swami ji said…

If you ever chart the course of a river, you will observe that it cuts through various terrains – sometimes rocky and mountainous, sometimes plain, sometimes marshy. At some places it flows fast with its banks reaching the horizon , while at other places it flows like a narrow stream; and at times, hidden from our view, it finds its wayunder the ground. Yet, it unfailingly flows on, never abandoning its true nature. We too, like a river, must never abandon our true nature, our inherent goodness.

Unfortunately, somewhere, in the constantly changing situation of everyday life – that elicit different emotions from us, we seem to lose all traces of the goodness that is an inherent part of us. At the first sign of anything unwanted and unwarranted – we take up a suit of armour. One of coldness and bitterness and anger. It only takes a few unkind words or actions by someone, and, our mood and day is ruined. We roam about bitter and resentful.

Don’t all of us understand rather well that we should not let others get under our skin? And, yet , this is where we perpetually fail ? Not once, but repeatedly.
It appears that how others behave with us is what controls our own behavior. We ponder and scrutinize whether they were polite, impolite or downright rude to us ? And if so – why were they so? At times, we are rattled and disturbed even by the way others look at us – even, if, it is for a fraction of a second. Our impulsive reaction is to somehow get back at them. We take a vow to payback everyone in the same coin. It is a pity to think how much precious time of ours is spent ruminating over how people have wronged us and how we shall extract our revenge. Be it at the workplace, in our own families, our friend groups or neighbors; we always find something wrong with how people have been behaving with us. And they end up occupying our thoughts more than anything else in the world. Our behavior, our actions, all become in line with feelings of revenge and bitterness.

The truth is, there always will be people who might not like us and could treat us in an undesirable manner. There always will be someone who will say or do something to hurt our feelings.There will always be someone who will not have our best interests at heart. Much like the mountains and rocks that try to impede a river’s flow ; the presence of such people in our lives – serves as a stumbling block in being our best selves. But, there is no avoiding such people. And, they will never cease to exist. But we must learn not to hate them and instead tell ourselves – ” Agar woh bure hai – toh tum bhi kyun bure bante ho…” Tum apni achchai kyun ek pal mein , gusse mein aane ke kaaran, kho dete ho? Apne andar ki achchai khone mein sabse zyaada nuksaan tumhara hi hoga…”

Just like the mountains and rocks that have been placed in a river’s course by God ; these people who we are irked by, too, are placed in our lives for a purpose – that only God understands. All we need to do is exercise some restraint and will-power and remind ourselves to refrain from indulging in the kind of behavior – that is disliked by us.The only ‘positive’ that we can take away from the presence of such ‘negative’ people in our lives – would be to learn to control ourselves from being uncouth and harsh to them – by reminding ourselves – “Why should we stoop to a level as low as theirs which will only take away our goodness?”

The spiritual seeker must imbibe this thought process. Every time something is said or done to him – that hurts him, his feelings ; he must ‘remember that’ – and ensure that he never does anything that could cause pain and grief to anyone else.That is how he will improve his own behavior. To keep calm and reassure himself while fighting the urge to react rudely and impulsively – that is what teaches the spiritual practitioner ‘control’. It teaches hin how the mind can be tamed, and, how one can regulate one’s emotional response with wisdom. He understands that rather than wasting time on drafting a tit – for – tat policy and address all ‘those’ – who had caused him mental stress with their bad behavior and horrible attitude – in a similar rude manner ; it would be better for him to forgive them, forget about them and instead focus on serving God and meditate on His name.

Swami ji said …

Is there anyone amongst us who hasn’t longed for ‘a’ thing ? To acquire ; possess and own ‘that’ particular thing – that had kept us awake, made us toss and turn – as we imagined and lived the moment – when we would claim ownership of whatever ‘it’ was that we had longed for ? And aren’t we pleasantly surprised, on seeing the fruition of many desires of ours, over and over again – which further encourages us to keep on adding our wants to our wish list ? The excitement with which we tick off all the ‘desires’ that are fulfilled – tends to make us completely forget – that very power – ‘God’ , who has been blessing us, by granting us our wishes. And, if ,we were to pause and deliberate just for a second whether – ” Could it be possible that God might want to see His ‘name’ too written by us in our wish list ?” Do we ever long to know God , crave to be blessed with His divine ‘दर्शन ‘ – with the same intensity with which we yearn for ‘सांसारिक ‘ सुख ? Or engrossed that we are in the ‘माया ‘ of materialism – do we feel that goods and assets alone are the end all of life, and , spirituality and ‘knowing’ God can be postponed to a later day and time ? And this is where we are wrong.

In fact , it could be unimaginable for those among us – who are deeply immersed in monetary affairs today – to believe that disenchantment and detachment from the world and its related affairs – awaits them in the coming days.
Unknown to them – a ‘सच्चा संत ‘ waits for them – patiently, yet, eagerly for his ‘सच्चा भक्त’ to come to Him – as He knows that he is destined to sit at His Lotus Feet and receive True Knowledge from Him…” एक सच्चा संत भी अपने सच्चे भक्त की प्रतीक्षा करता है और आतुर होता है उससे अपने ज्ञान से, नीली छतरीवाले से अवगत कराने के लिये … गुरू जानते हैं की जिस अध्यात्मिक तार ने उनको और भक्त को जोड़ रखा है- उसे aur मज़बूत करना है …”

A Guru looks forward to meeting , blessing and transmitting His thoughts to His devotees. And nothing could give a Guru greater happiness than to see His devotees remember His words, imbibe them and put them into practice in their every day lives. Often, a Guru’s teachings do come to the devotees mind when they are about to make a decision that will impact their lives significantly. Sometimes, His words flash through their mind , as a reminder , when their actions and behaviour are not in tandem with His teachings. Sometimes, a Guru’s advice will seem contrary to what the rest of the world tells us , but , deep within , we know that the direction being given to us by Him – is correct – even though the rest are unable to understand it. Even in the most trying of times, a devotee must not give up on his Guru’s teachings. For, before long, we understand that the path shown by our Guru always turns out to be the right one to take. It is possible that the devotee could be tempted to – ‘Just this once’ – he might tell himself – feel like straying from the path – which his Guru had instructed him to opt for – when unexpectedly life spins out of his control. It is during the demanding phases, in particular, when we must draw maximum strength and courage from the ‘gyaan’ that our Guru had communicated to us in the past and which He continues to do in the present too. It doesn’t matter whether He is physically present with us or not.

“जब हम एक बार अपने’ गुरु ‘ पर विश्वास कर लेते हैं, तो उनपे हमारा विश्वास अटूट होना चाहिए…हम सब को यहाँ अपने ‘कर्म ‘ काटने हैं …ऐसा हो ही नहीं सकता कि हम अपने कर्मों के फल से बच सकते हैं… हमें उनसे कोई बचा नहीं सकता है, परन्तु ‘गुरू ‘ हमें शक्ति देते हैं उनका सामना करने की…”

While , it might not be possible for a devotee to always carry his Guru in his heart and mind, due to his pre – occupation with the different roles that he has to perform in his lifetime ; the
Guru, on the other hand, always keeps a close watch on his devotees ; clears the obstacles from his path ; helps him rise when he falls.The devotee could be unaware of his Guru’s loving, watchful eyes on him. But, the Guru, like a divine sentinel, is always ensuring the devotee’s safety. Guiding him with the slightest of nudges onto safer paths and to the desired destinations and outcome of every action that he performs. All a Guru ever seeks from a devotee – is his earnestness to follow His instructions and teachings.

In many ways, a devotee is often pampered by the Guru’s Grace – as He tries his best to keep the bitter realities of the world at bay from his devotee, and, even in the face of crisis, gives him the courage to tide over it valiantly. The devotees might feel that they have faced many hardships, but, they do not know, how sheltered and protected they are from the actual brunt of these hardships due to a Guru’s protective Grace on them. But does the devotees’ ego allow them to ever acknowledge the hand that shields them in this world, not just from outer influences, but , from their own actions too ?

A Guru draws great pleasure on seeing His devotees’ increased alertness on understanding the nuances of the divine words that are said by Him to them. Many a times – many things are left unsaid by a Guru – as He expects His devotees to make a beginning to understand the ‘unsaid’. It is in silence that a Guru’s voice is heard – crystal clear …” मैं यहाँ क्यों बैठा हूँ ?” ” तुम चिंता क्यों करते हो ? ” “सब अच्छा होगा…” ” मैं हर पाल तुम्हारे साथ हूँ…” and a ‘saccha sant’ means what He says.

Swami ji said…

Do we , at times, ask ourselves whether we’ve understood the meaning of life in ‘whole’ ? Or have we been selective ? Categorised ‘life’ into ‘दुख ‘ and ‘सुख ‘ and have concluded that life is only about these ‘two’ – and maintain a rigid stance – that there can be no other ‘front’ apart from them? Have we in a way developed some kind of a blind attachment to
‘दुख ‘ और ‘सुख ‘ – and is our involvement with them so strong and straight from the heart – that we are not able to either ‘detach’ ourselves from them or remain unaffected by them ? Why do we feel that – “अगर हम आज सुखी हैं, तो हम आगे भी सुखी ही रहेंगे …” “और जब जीवन में दुख आता है, तो ऐसे लगता है की यह दुख कभी नहीं जाएगा …” And this is where we are wrong as life is in a constant state of motion – and things can never remain the same. But we allow these to rule our mind and emotions.

Wouldn’t we make life less complicated if we were to tell ourselves, talk sense into ourselves that in the wheel of time there is no escaping –
‘joy’ and ‘sorrow’, ‘दुख ‘ और ‘सुख ‘ – as they will always show up at every turn ? We can’t avoid them. We will bump into them – not accidentally – but because they were meant to come our way and we were destined to meet them.

To even assume for a fraction of a second that it is possible for us – to prevent events related to ‘दुख ‘ and ‘सुख ‘ – unfold before us – would be a grave mistake. What kind of a life would we be living – if we constantly hoped to see the highs of success and prayed for an escape from the lows of failure ? And, if we were to live life this way- ‘ Would we call it living? ‘ If , we were living with a mindset like this – then there would be no difference between us – and a gambler – who always feels that he is at the mercy of his luck. Isn’t he always gripped in anxiety and suspense at the outcome that awaits him at the end of his game of cards ? Can we live with bated breath through out our lifetime?

“अगर हम हमेशा यही सोचते रहेंगे कि ‘दुख’ आएगा… अब ‘दुख’ आनेवाला ही है…” – then will we ever find ourselves in a state of calmness and peace ? We will always find ourselves tense and edgy ; our nerves frayed – looking fearfully at our doorway for ‘sorrow’ to make its much dreaded entry – and the thought – ” हम अपने आप को इस से निकालेंगे कैसे …” – will be uppermost in our mind. Life is not a cage for us to feel trapped between the cyclic emotions of ‘craving’ for success and happiness and ‘avoidance’ of sorrow and ‘ ‘दुःख ‘. But that life, in its fullness, includes ‘falling’ to failures – as much as it includes – ‘rising’ to name and fame. Similarly, it is not possible that we will always be successful in everything that we do…’ सुख आयेगा और जायेगा …”

When will ‘we’ detach ourselves ; stop taking everything personally – and instead begin to play the role of a spectator – and rise above the so called ‘joy’ and ‘sorrow’? Why do we pray for success and sunshine only?
Why don’t we remain undaunted and fearless while heading into a storm ; praying for strength and wisdom to help us find a way through it ?

We can think of hundreds of reasons to remain unhappy ; but , very often, find it difficult to create moments of happiness for ourselves. Don’t we hear people all around us say – ‘ I am happy ‘today’…’ ‘ I am sad ‘today’…’ Can’t we rise above ‘joy’ and ‘sorrow’? True joy of life can only be experienced when man accepts all that is happening around him as ‘divine’ play. He does not fret over what seems to have gone wrong and does not go overboard with happiness ; when things seem to go in his favour. Neither does he take pride in his success nor is he perturbed on facing failure. He is merely amused by the unfolding of God’s will, like an innocent child – who watches his parents’ antics with wonder.

Acceptance and patience is the key to escape the anxiety and uncertainty of life. As long as we live by our principles – seek to do good and be good in all circumstances- we would have done all that we were meant to do.
Slowly but surely, we will realize that the times we worried about the future and the times we claimed that everything was perfect , in place – for the future – could later turn out to be moments of misjudgment from our end. As time proves to us, many a times, we end up being wrong in both cases. Only then do we begin to understand that such behavior in the past was merely a waste of precious time ; a distraction from the ‘present’ moment – as it is ‘that’ moment that holds all that we need.

Swami ji said…

We all are guilty of being narcissists – happy and content with our nature and temperament – finding nothing wrong with who we have become over the years. And so convinced are we of our own perfection that we are sure there is nothing that others will ever find or have to complain about us. To reinforce our misled conviction, we recall every compliment that was generously paid to us by all those who know us and are fond of us. We feel wonderful on being recognised and lauded, basking in the glory of praise and admiration. But, as has always been said – ‘Nothing in excess is good’ – and an excess of approval and applause by the people around us is quite undesirable – making us accustomed to receiving only appreciation and compliments in abundance ; but, we are disconcerted on being criticised for even the smallest of things. Criticism causes us great distress. We worry as to what could have gone wrong – for someone to have looked at us with an eagle eye and to point out our faults to us – one by one. Censure is not known to us – when it is we who are at the receiving end – “परंतु दूसरों की आलोचना करने में हम सबसे आगे खड़े रहते हैं…”

Do we have some kind of a double standard when it comes to our refusal in accepting any criticism that comes our way – as compared to the readiness with which we participate gleefully in coming down heavily on others…”हम खुद तो औरों की ‘आलोचना’ करने में माहिर हैं – लेकिन अपनी ‘आलोचना’ सुनने के लिए बिल्कुल तैयार नहीं हैं…” Much like a lioness that springs to her cub’s defence – we stand up to defend ourselves from the volley of hostile words that could come our way.

“हमे , ख़ुद मे , थोड़ा सा भी परिवर्तन लाने
मैं बहुत कठिनाई लगती है…” Why do we find it so challenging to ‘change’ ourselves – even when we know that ‘change’ is a universal truth ? We see it happen all around us. All the time – the ever ‘changing’ world. But , we withdraw completely – when someone tries to suggest a few improvements that we could make in ourselves. Why are we averse to criticism?

“We are above criticism” – we reassure ourselves. And critiques warrant no more than a scornful look – a reward to those for criticising us – we tell ourselves complacently.
How dare he condemn us? Why should we listen to him? Such are the counter questions that come to our mind.

Why do we have such a closed mind when it comes to hearing a few words that could potentially help us correct ourselves? Do we really believe that it is possible for us to have no imperfections? Doesn’t a flower need both – the Sun and the rain to grow and flourish ? In a manner much similar – we too need to remember that it would be best for us to accept both – compliments and criticism – to evolve in the best possible way. Rather than resisting the changes that honest criticism could bring about in us ; we feel it to be to be below our dignity to be rational and to hear what the other person has to say about us.

Often times, criticism comes from quarters most unexpected. It stings and even enrages us. But, we must have the self-control to try and observe what is said to us. We must try and understand why someone sees certain shortcomings in us. More often than not, these shortcomings are already known to us, but are overlooked by us due to the immense affection that we have for ourselves. In fact, if , we observe closely, it is criticism – which rings true in our ears – that agitates us the most. For it highlights that which we have subconsciously chosen to ignore and turn a blind eye to.
Instead of feeling slighted and angry, we must accept such criticism and begin to work on our deficiencies.
That is the only way we can grow and be happy with ourselves. For the one person we can never really fool – is ourself. Even if the world thinks of us to be great, we should never be satisfied with ourselves, if, we have not pushed ourselves to be the best version – that we can be of ourselves. And that means to accept criticism and use it as a guiding light to improve ourselves.

To be spiritually successful, humility is the only virtue that is needed. The humble have no ego that makes them stray from the path of God. The humble accept what they need to change and what they need to do to receive His blessings. They do not argue over what they can and cannot change about themselves.