Day: May 18, 2024

Swami ji said…

Since pre-historic times, man has always preferred to live in groups. Initially, he found strength in numbers.
This strength was useful in hunting, gathering and safe – keeping. It also led to the development of relationships between people, giving rise to social structures of family, communities – as we see around the world today.

As a result, today, man is always, in some way or another, always ‘connected’ with someone else. If it is not in one’s physical presence, there is always the digital world of messages, video calls – that keeps him connected with
others. And, he, mistakenly, feels very secure with that tangible connection.

In fact, the assurance of constant accessibility to others ; of
‘someone being around’ us ; the availability of immediate family, relatives and friends has made us almost alien to the idea of being alone. In fact, the idea of living alone, of spending time without someone with us – is almost daunting and scary…” मैं अकेला कैसे रहूँगा ?” मैं अकेला रहने के बारे मैं सोच भी नही सकता !” – we say with a tinge of worry. Many a times, seeing someone live alone makes us pity them, or , wonder how lonely they would be. We are convinced that someone who is alone cannot be happy or lead a life of contentment. This repeated narrative has created a negative and fearful perspective on being alone. On seeing a ‘sanyaasi’ , a monk – aren’t we left wondering – ‘How does he live alone?’ ‘How does he manage all by himself ?’

Yet, in full honesty, can anyone really say that they know what it feels like to be alone? How many have even ventured to try and experience it? What is it about being alone that is so scary? Is it simply being alone with our thoughts? Or, is it, that we have to then live only with ‘our selves’ – something we possibly do not find very pleasing? We need to define the meaning of being ‘alone’ – individually – to understand what it means to us and follow it up.

We have to ask ourselves whether we avoid being alone – to avoid self-reflection – aware that we might not appreciate when we see what we truly are ! Many a times, we feel overwhelmed, when we take stock of ourselves and simply want to avoid ‘thinking’ about the unanswered questions that could ring out about us – in the quietness of loneliness.

Yes, of course, there are situations when we certainly need other people to be around us. But , we must reflect on why we do not try to enjoy the bliss of solitude. To understand the divine significance of those precious moments when we find ourselves alone – we just need to remind ourselves that God has sent everyone else away – so that we can spend time with Him.

The spiritual seeker must always strive to spend some quality time with himself ; question himself as to what is it that he seeks in this lifetime ? Is he aware of the significance of this lifetime of his ? What does he intend to do with it ? Does he want to be a conqueror of material goods or overcome the lure of all the trappings and win over God with his devotion and faith ? This is what would make him aware of how the mind operates ; its nature to wander and worry ; to procrastinate on doing what is essential – yet difficult. It is when we are alone that we can truly begin to work on ourselves.When we make an earnest attempt to cut ourselves away from the distractions of engaging with others – only then, can we truly begin to engage with the ‘self’. We begin to understand what our character truly is – as then there is no one to ‘act’ in front of us. We gain an opportunity to get a true measure of ourselves in black and white, and, who we are as a person.

Loneliness becomes solitude as the process of self-reflection and self-improvement begins. As we take steps to improve ourselves, we begin to enjoy the warmth of the ‘soul’ ; we begin to ‘feel’ a live connection with God ; oneness with nature. Our process of self-discovery, also begins to tell us a lot about the world around us. More importantly, we begin to realise how fruitless a lot of social interaction is – as it does not necessarily make us happy. In solitude, we begin to appreciate the value of our own time, our thoughts ; to preserve the sanctity of the mind – and make constructive changes to our lives to improve everything about ourselves. It is only when we are alone, that we begin to understand – what it is that we truly need. We realise the importance of keeping company of those people – who contribute further to our spiritual and mental development and try to move away from those who unfortunately seem to hinder conversations related to the awakening of our ‘soul’.