Month: April 2023

Swami ji said…

” हालाँकि यह दोनो शब्द … ‘खामियाँ’ और ‘खूबियां’ एक ही अक्षर से शुरु होते हैं….परन्तु दोनो शब्दों के मायने मे बहुत अन्तर है …’ And , each one of us , human that we are, are bound to be a combination of both – weaknesses and strengths…’ हम सब मे खामियाँ और खूबियां दोनो होती हैं…’
Fortunate are those – ‘जो खूबियों से लैस हैं…’ – who are strong, positive and cross the challenges of life with a ‘never – say – die’ frame of mind. But what about those whose weaknesses out – number their strengths ? What kind of an attitude do we bear for such family members, friends or relatives? Do we make it evident to them that they are on our watch list ; our critical eyes
constantly assessing them ; making them feel like worthless objects being subjected to silent censure by us !

When did we become so unkind – so devoid of compassion ! Why do we zero down on a person’s failings and talk only about them ? ‘खामियां सब मे होती हैं…उस इन्सान की जो खूबियां हैं, जोअच्छाईयां हैं ,उनको देखो..’Focus on his strengths ; make him aware of them, if , he is oblivious to them – as his weaknesses have dominated his strengths. He will most certainly have a few. Rather than reminding him of his weaknesses all the time – why don’t we loan him our strength ; let him know that ‘together’ we can try and help him overcome his frailty. Instead of whispering about his flaws – let us be vocal about his positives. Reach out to him with your kindness and caring words.

‘हम मे से कई शारीरिक खामियों से भी झूझते हैं ‘ … People suffer with physical disabilities, mental health issues and addictions, and, naturally, most of them are aware of the imperfection that is prevalent in them. A few, at times, could remain in denial about the problem that they are faced with.They struggle – either to be better or to muster up the needed strength to cope with the condition and affliction that unfortunately has got the better of them.The last thing they need is – in the face rejection – from us. It is not even pity that they are looking for ! All they need from people around them is love – unconditional and complete – acceptance and understanding of the effort being made by them to battle through the rigours of life with their physical or mental shortcomings. Sadly, it is this emotion, that most of us are unable to provide them with ! We need to feel and bear love for them ; appreciate their endeavours to put up a fight – ‘अपनी खामियों ke khilaaf ‘ – and laud them genuinely for their efforts.

We must not dwell on the shortcomings of our fellow beings, but, rather focus on the smallest fragment of strength, positivity, flair or talent that exists within them, and, exhort them to present it to outsiders – fearlessly. We should strive to see beyond the superficial surface and look deep into the souls of those around us who need to be made to feel stronger – with something that costs us nothing – selfless love.

For it is only when we take the time to appreciate and cultivate the strengths of others that we can truly help them overcome their weaknesses. Let us, therefore, be compassionate and understanding, like a gentle breeze that nudges the butterfly’s wings towards the light – and help them realise their true worth.

Swami ji said…

How many of us can truly say that we are genuinely happy in the success of others? Or are truly pleased to see others achieve something that could not be attained by us? Can we honestly say we are delighted to see an exponential growth in someone else’s fortune ? Of course, there would be a few among us who could say with complete honesty that nothing gives them greater happiness than seeing others succeed and realise their potential. Sadly, the number of such well-wishers remains small and only a few of us can claim to rejoice with all sincerity – without a pang of envy or resentment – in the feats and accomplishments of others.

Jealousy often sets in early in our lives – be it between us and our siblings or our friends. From a young age, we find ourselves in competition with those around us – at home, school , or , in the playground. And , when someone else gets more attention, is more popular or liked, we can’t help but feel envious. Age has nothing to do with this emotion – as most of us ‘feel’ it within us during all phases of our life – as children , adolescents and adults.

But, do we ever pause and introspect when the all too familiar emotion of jealousy creeps into our psyche? It is a negative and hostile feeling that surfaces instantaneously upon hearing someone’s boastful proclamation of triumph. Unless that person is dear to us, the primary emotion that engulfs us is – jealousy. It is regrettable that we often surrender ourselves to this envy whenever we encounter someone else’s success, especially, if we view a particular domain as our exclusive forte. We cannot fathom being surpassed, outperformed, or , overtaken by any one else and jealousy ensnares us easily. We appear powerless to restrain it – and allow it to deplete our energy and transform our outlook into one that is bleak, negative, and sombre.

But , perhaps , it is worth considering that giving in to jealousy is the easy way out , for most of us. While it is baffling to see the way in which jealousy tends to sneak up on us so easily – almost without us realising it – we must train the mind to check itself , when it sees our heart being engulfed in the flames of envy. Instead of resenting the good fortune of others, we must try to observe and understand what they have done right to deserve their success. We should, in such situations, be motivated to learn and emulate the exceptional traits that made others more accomplished than us and excel in a field of their choice.

Jealousy stems from the ‘ego’ – as it is that which greatly values and desires worldly success and validation. When we allow jealousy to take hold of us, we are essentially surrendering to our ego and closing ourselves to any further spiritual development. However, we can choose to transcend this negative emotion by cultivating awareness and mindfulness in our thoughts and actions – and be free of jealousy and filled with love for all.

Finding peace and contentment in any and all situations is what we must strive for, if, we are to rid our hearts of even the slightest trace of envy. We must stop measuring our own lives’ worth by seeing what others achieve and acquire. We must make ourselves more humble and accept that wherever we are in life – it is solely due to God’s grace and our previous ‘karma’. So, it is not in our right to feel bitter , when God rewards someone with what they have earned and deserved in His eyes. ‘ ‘ईष्र्या’ ki aag mein hum khud hi jalte hain…aur sabse zyaada nuksaan apna hi karte hain… ‘ईष्र्या’ ne Duryodhan ko andha bana diya tha…Ussey antt mein kya mila ?’

Swami ji said…

Every incident, occurrence, happening, or , interaction that takes place in our life ; plays out the way it does – was meant to happen that way. The element of surprise or shock, smiles or tears, elation or woe – every emotion experienced by us – had to happen that way. Recall the times when, against all odds, fate suddenly shifted in our favour, delivering us from the brink of defeat to the heights of triumph – all of it was fated to be so.

Everything that happens and takes place in our lives is providential – planned much in advance by the Almighty. Nothing happens by chance. No meeting is coincidental. We cross paths with every ‘soul’ – every individual who is destined to enter our lives during our sojourn in this mortal realm. But, apart from all those we meet and greet – be it in our personal and professional lives – the ‘meeting’ most sacred, holy and divine is when an individual’s – “भाग्य” और उसके kai janmo के अच्छे ‘कर्म’ उसे एक ‘सच्चे संत’ के द्वार पर ले जाते हैं… ‘गुरु’ भी अपने ‘सच्चे भक्त’ का बहुत समय से इंतजार
कर रहे होते हैं। जो divy तार ‘गुरू’ और शिष्य को जोड़ते हैं, वह उस नीली छतरी वाले की मर्जी और तय करे हुए समय पर ही मिलते हैं।’

The ‘Guru’, on accepting a devotee, takes upon himself the responsibility of ensuring that… “उनका कोई भक्त दरबार से खाली हाथ नहीं जाए।” He knows what his devotees want and he gives them what he knows is the best for each one of them. “एक ‘गुरु’ भी अपने भक्तों के प्रेम से बंधा होता है! एक आत्मज्ञानी ‘गुरु’ अपने भक्तों को सात मांओं का प्रेम देते हैं’… and much like a mother – cleanses their ‘being’ , but, he focuses on purifying their ‘inner’ being – अपने ‘ज्ञान’ से, अपनी पवित्र नज़र से.” It becomes the duty of the ‘guru’ to share his knowledge with his devotees – and after doing that, he leaves it to them – whether they are willing to embrace his teachings or remain unaffected by them and forget them within no time at all. Nothing would give a ‘guru’ greater happiness, than to see his devotees, eagerly, put into practice his words and teachings at the earliest.

Often times, those of us who are fortunate enough to have a ‘guru’ – are given a small instruction by the ‘guru’ – that appears to be seemingly insignificant on the surface. While, in the divinity of the sacred moment , we eagerly agree to abide by our ‘guru’s aadesh’, as time passes by, we do not pay much heed to it. We remember it, but, do not do much about it. We fail to realise that a task that was deceptively inconsequential – had been significantly given to us by the ‘guru’ – as it was most suited to us. We fail to realise that our ‘guru’ might have created a tailor-made solution for our problems; might have given us the ‘key’ to unlocking our own happiness.

After the Pandavas emerged victorious in the Kurukshetra war, they visited sage Vyasa to seek his blessings. Curious to know as to how they had succeeded in achieving victory, the sage posed a question to them. Arjuna, filled with pride, boasted that it was his skills as a great warrior – that had secured their triumph – and that Krishna’s role had been limited. This response did not sit well with Vyasa, who was disappointed by Arjuna’s arrogance, and , ingratitude towards Krishna. In a fit of anger, the sage cursed Arjuna that he would forget all the teachings that had been imparted to him by Shri Krishna on the battlefield.

This tale serves as a cautionary reminder of the consequences of disregarding one’s ‘guru’s’ teachings. After all, if , forgetting these teachings is deemed punishment enough, why would a spiritual seeker willingly inflict such a penalty upon himself by failing to follow and imbibing the wisdom imparted by his Guru? Would a worthy devotee find it demanding to walk the path shown to him by his ‘guru’ ? ‘Kya ‘satya’ ke marg par chalna , ‘nek karma’ karna’ , meethi vaani bolna, ‘aatyadhmikta’ ko apnana – bahut mushkil hai…’ Would it not be akin to walking off a cliff – inviting certain doom ?

Swami ji said …

Saints, sadgurus, self-realised souls, Messiahs of God, and The Son of God – all have underlined and emphasised on the importance of ‘forgiveness’ – developing within us the skill that we find most difficult to relate with – the ability to forgive. We must forgive not only others, but also seek forgiveness for the sins and wrongs committed by us – the lies, deceit, and falsehoods we speak – without as much as flickering an eyelid. There could be a few instances when we might have unknowingly hurt someone by saying or doing something that could have been deemed insensitive by them, but, which from our end was not meant to be a double-edged sword. However, can we say with one hundred percent certainty that our intent is pure and there is no vicious, hidden intent to hurt someone knowingly? What about the times when we rehearse the hard-hitting words we plan to hurl at a person to get back at someone who had hurt us? “”क्या हम में से कोई ऐसा कह सकता है कि हमने कोई झूठ, गलती या पाप नहीं किया है?”” It would not be possible for any of us to say so. We are human, after all, aren’t we? – we would counter-question.

If we were truly sensitive to the principle of forgiveness and understood its humane aspect – the underlying goodness that it has in abundance for us – we would perhaps practise it religiously – with a sense of fierce purpose – every single day. We just need to understand that forgiving the person who has hurt us intentionally or unintentionally benefits us the most. The burden of carrying the heavy weight of anger and hatred for those, who have hurt us emotionally their barbed attacks, is lightened to a great extent, the moment we talk ourselves into forgiving them. How liberating, releasing, and freeing it is to experience that feeling of forgiving others! We can actually feel the shackles of all those negative emotions that had chained us tight within them – snap and being replaced with the most positive emotions possible – love and joy being the major ones – when we forgive those who we feel have wronged us.

So busy are we counting the mistakes and the number of times ‘others’ have offended us that we fail to realise that the same rule applies to ‘us’ too. If we are aware of our whereabouts in life, we will realise that we are no less than them. What about the countless times we’ve hurt others? Do we reflect on the innumerable times we’ve made it a point to hurt others where it hurts the most ? Are we filled with a feeling of regret for doing so and repent about our wrongdoing ? Do we make a genuine effort to seek God’s forgiveness sincerely from our heart and soul – pledging not to repeat this ill-habit ever , not to sin again , cleanse ourselves ? ‘माना गलती हर किसी से होती है …पर जब तक हम अपनी गलती को मानने को तैयार नहीं होते – तब तक हम उसे दोहराते ही रहेंगे। Yaad rakho – ‘ ‘Galti’ ko ‘gunah’ ban ne mein zyaada der nahi lagti hai …’

We need to remember that if we continue to remain blind to our mistakes and errors, the probability of turning into repeat offenders cannot be overlooked. ‘हमें कभी भी अपनी गलती को मानने में देरी नहीं करनी चाहिए…गलती करने का पश्चाताप हमें ज़रूर होना चाहिए…’ Failing to do so could make it very difficult to stop ourselves from hurting others repeatedly.

Acknowledging, admitting, repenting and seeking forgiveness from our Creator for every wrong done by us – makes us aware of the wrong done by us. We begin to understand that asking for forgiveness would entail making a conscious effort to stay away from a particular sin in future ; gives us that glimmer of hope ; a golden opportunity to turn into better individuals – who take upon themselves the responsibility of implementing God’s divine teaching from early on in life.

When we forgive others, we feel within us, the same love and grace for others – that God has for us – when He forgives us for our sins and wrongdoings. We also succeed in breaking free from the chains of bitterness and anger that had bottled up within us and had held us back from expressing forgiveness for others. Instead, we experience peace and joy, and build stronger relationships with those around us.

Swami ji said…

Each one of us mean something to someone in this world. There is always some role – significant or insignificant – that we play in each other’s lives – be it in a professional setting; a social or familial construct.We are life-saving doctors, civil servants, pay masters, mentors, fathers and mothers – many times donning multiple hats at the same time. These roles and responsibilities that we have at various stages of our lives must not be taken lightly; as the ripple effects our actions produce in any of these ‘avatars’ – can have very serious consequences.

On returning home after watching a movie, we often have animated discussions about the impressive acting skills of our favourite actors. We are fascinated by their ability to act perfectly and are left wondering as to how are they able to project every emotion so convincingly on the screen. The answer is pretty simple. They follow the director’s instructions to the last detail and put their heart and soul in portraying an excellent representation of the role that they are supposed to perform to entertain and enthral us with.

And in a way this is exactly what each one of us is expected to do. Perform the unique role allotted to each one of us by our Creator in our lifetime with keen interest , a sense of commitment , complete involvement and determination – understand that this is His will. All we have to do is listen to God’s voice in our heart which is constantly directing us – telling us what is the right thing to do ; the correct way to ‘act’. Afterall, he is the the script – writer, producer and director of the role that we are destined to enact in our lifetime for the extremely short span of time – during which we flicker in this infinite.

So, we too must listen to ‘Him’ and adhere to His instructions obediently – as He not only helps us by defining our goal clearly before us – but also enables us develop thoughts that are streamlined towards our goal – and thus enable us to play out our roles perfectly. As parents, we must be deeply conscious of the the manner in which every word , mannerism and behaviour of ours is observed and implemented by our children. We are their role models and they look up to us for inspiration and guidance. Instead of only telling them to be good, we must be ‘good’ ourselves to lay out a blueprint for them to follow. As employers we must be fair and reward our employees – recognising their hard work and contribution. As spouses we must be honest and responsible. We must put in everything we have to be the best – par excellence – in the role that has been allotted to us by Him.

There are days when we feel disgruntled. We feel that we can be much more than what we are in life. We feel shortchanged by life. We look at the roles of others and wish we could be in their shoes. We remain dissatisfied and develop a negative attitude towards our own responsibilities. We might feel resentful while taking care of our ageing parents – on seeing our friends free of any such responsibilities. As an employee we might secretly laugh behind our bosses certain that we would surely do a much better job than him. The list is endless, and it is succinct to say – that many a time – the grass seems to be greener on the other side.

But we must be mindful of falling into such traps for this is what makes us lose focus. Like in any job, it is only by performing well in ‘one’ role that we earn the right to be promoted to another role. Even if we might not seem highly consequential, or , important in the bigger picture, we must strive for perfection in carrying out our responsibilities. God judges us all equally. What only matters to him is whether or not we followed ‘His’ script with a sense of surrender, determined to play our part perfectly , validating His faith in us to adapt to the role ear – marked by Him for us.

Shri Hanuman was all powerful and knowledgeable. He could have won over many kingdoms with His valour.Yet , not once, did anyone ever hear Him complain about anything – as He played the divine role of being Lord Ram’s ‘sevak’ – a role closest to His heart. So committed was He to the role that God had desired Him to play – that He devoted Himself completely to the service of Lord Ram. We must draw inspiration from His selfless service and consider our role and responsibilities as being sacred and holy and perform them as service to God.