“Vinamrata”

Swamiji says …

” The raucous cacophony of raised, angry, loud voices can be heard anywhere and everywhere these days. We don’t have to strain our ears much to hear voices – impatient , shouting and yelling at each other – each trying to drown the other voice. Soft, gentle, polite voices have been stifled in the din of sharp, rough, piercing voices.The art of speaking in a refined, cultured manner seems to have flourished in a bygone era, as we seem to have completely forgotten, that the manner in which we speak, conduct ourselves , interact with others is observed and judged by all who we come across, in our journey of life.”

“We cannot deign ignorance of the fact that an impression is formed about us , by others , during every interaction that we have with them. Our temperament, mannerisms and attitude are constantly being observed as we engage with people around us, speak to them and interact with them. The manner in which we communicate – whether we are soft and refined or crass and forceful; our reactions to success and disappointments, minor irritations and unexpected favours – all these project volumes about our family background, our raising , upbringing and education.”

“It is rightly said – ‘Real beauty lies beneath the surface’ – and in order to delve deep and understand the correct perspective of these words, we need to outgrow the typical mentality that has always clouded our vision. We declare a person to be ‘ beautiful’ the minute our eyes ‘behold’ a beautiful, handsome individual. We are so greatly enamoured by these individuals’ physical appearance , that we just gape and marvel at their good looks – but are shocked when that beautiful facade is distorted by the mocking, condescending, and disdainful behaviour that they direct at others. How good are these ‘good’ looks then ?
On the other hand, we might pass by an ordinary looking person , without giving him a second look; but, this very person surely catches our attention and we certainly turn to look back at him when we hear him speak – his voice filled with love, respect and politeness. We are unable to prevent ourselves from saying – ‘ Uske moonh se phool jhadh rahe hain!’ ‘He has such a wonderful way of speaking ! ‘ – we chorus, and before long we are smitten, and completely in awe of his style of speaking ! Looks are of no consequence after that.”

“A person who conveys his concern, care and thoughtful attitude for others through his words and voice benefits greatly – as many avenues, and opportunities make way for him on their own accord, without him having to struggle to create a way through unknown ventures and territories. ‘Jis insaan mein ‘vinamrata’ hoti hai, uske raaste apne aap khulte jaate hai !’ Other people too laud this commendable quality of his and wonder as to how is it possible for him to maintain an air of calm and composure in his verbal dealings with others, and not allow an inflection of rudeness to mar the quality of his tone.’ Log bhi uski iss quality ko appreciate kartein hai ! ‘

“The effect of such an individual is so mesmerizing and prolific on ‘those’ who derive great pleasure in speaking in an arrogant , demeaning manner with the others around them, that they are unable to remain unaffected by the positive, pleasant vibes and warm comfort that his soft words provide them. Their frequent , richly rewarding interaction with him, motivates them to imbibe a similar ‘speech ‘ trait and they are more than willing to give up the ‘not so pleasing’, harsh, coarse manner which they might have adopted to dominate or belittle others around them. ‘Woh agar char logon ko bhi milta hai toh apni vinamrata se unko sudhaar deta hai! ‘ The same people who might have earlier sneered at his prim and proper way of speaking and imitated him behind his back – develop a great liking for him and want to be like him – ‘Woh unko achcha lagne lagta hai!’ “

” This ‘good’ person who never waxes eloquent about himself – unknowingly, develops an identity that is associated with his soft approach towards others – and surprisingly, the ‘other’ bandwagon no longer has any reservations in following his footsteps and emulating him. ‘ Vinamrata ‘ uski ek pehchaan ban jaati hai! ‘No one could be a happier person than him, as he holds no grudges against anyone else. He bears love and, only love, for all around him and doesn’t have time to nurture dislike or hatred for anyone. He believes in winning over people with his goodness that is clearly visible to one and all. ‘Uske mann mein sab ke liye pyaar hota hai … Usey kisi se grihna nahi hoti hai! Apni achchai se sab ko jeet teh jaata hai!’ People with an acerbic, malicious tongue and a mean attitude towards others, too , cannot but help like a person like him and are encouraged to change their volatile, disturbing behaviour … ‘Dusht pravrati ke insaan ko bhi woh achcha lag ne lagta hai ! ‘ “

” When it is possible for us to win hearts by speaking gently in a happy , lilting voice, by injecting reassurance and warmth in it ; then why should we turn people away, from us, by hurting them with a vicious, verbal whiplash ? “